At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
