On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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