ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
This baby is an asshole
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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