So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
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