spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
She swung at the pinata with crutches
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
