You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I want a musical about memes.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
