Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
