You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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