You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Randomize
