Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize