He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Boobs speak an international language.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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