he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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