dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
