Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
