dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
My dick has a subreddit
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
