In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize