It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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