if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
