so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
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