If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Randomize
