Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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