Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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