Tell her she can't have a vagina
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
