Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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