I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
