nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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