You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
