We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize