If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
