Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
