My first STD was from a foam party
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
