i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
he just fucked me for my cheese.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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