I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
