Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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