just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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