Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
