she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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