If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
