just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
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