I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
