I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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