This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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