So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
