He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
me + whiskey = a bad person
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
