Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
