very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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