he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Randomize
