THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
