if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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