we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
