I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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