I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize