My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Randomize